Cairo Association of Teachers - Newsletter

CAT Tracks for May 29, 2009 EYE ON THE BOARD...REDUX

Do you know me...

I prowled the hallways and alleyways of Cairo School District Number One from March 22, 2002 through December 16, 2003...when the BOE embarked upon a particularly gruesome reign of terror.

It was my job to keep a close "Eye on the Board" and to report the outrage of the day, week, month...

Beginning in 2004, I was put out to pasture...having served my feline friends well.

As they say, all good things must come to an end...

Actually, I was already in the process of packing my bags, having received an earlier alert for a not-so-covert operation...to monitor the District's financial progress over the remaining two years of the newly ratified Contract. According to my inside contact, CSD #1 has over $3 million in the bank, yet claims that it will be broke by the year 2012! I was told that my mission, should I choose to accept it, was to watch the "fiscal responsibility" of the Superintendent and BOE and to alert one and all of any outrageous behavior...behavior that did NOT reflect BOE-FOP's dire "the sky is falling, the sky is falling" predictions/projections.

Then, this morning, my Blackberry rang...at 3 a.m.

It was "Ranting Ron"...

Who else at that hour of the morning?!

WOW...he was spitting fur!

All I could make out for the first couple of minutes was something about VIOLINS, which of course made my cat guts clinch!!!

When I finally slowed him down some, Ron was screaming something about the financially-in-peril school district spending $1,000 a day for a Master Violin Teacher and paying her to commute from Carbondale.

As Ron rolled through an impressive assortment of expletives, I activated the calendar function on my Blackberry, thinking that maybe my naps had gone awry. Surely Ron was playing an April Fool's joke on me. Hmmm...nope, May 29th?

Ron went on and on about the District cutting the salary of its math and science teachers by over $2300 each, but pondering paying a Carbondale teacher $35,000 plus mileage to teach 2nd and 3rd graders how to play the violin.

I thought to myself..."Poor, Ron, he's finally gone over the edge. Years of abuse have finally taken their toll."

What struck me as truly sad was that I had just seen Ron on Wednesday. He had paid a visit to the pasture...checking out the facilities. He seemed sooooo happy...bragging to everyone that "It took a year, but I'm finally REALLY retired!"

When Ron finally paused for a breath, I gently tried to calm him...to bring him back to reality. I thought I could get his attention and make him realize the silliness of what he was saying by gently asking him to provide proof of his outrageous assertions. I said "Uh, Ron, you know we need documentation of such serious allegations."

Ron was undeterred. He said "Check your e-mail...I scanned their proposal and sent it to you."

Poor delusional Ron...

To humor him, I told him "Just a second. I'll check it out..."

I wondered what Ron's reaction would be when I had to tell him that there was no attachment...there was no such proposal. I mean, no small rural school district, already under the control of a Financial Oversight Panel and proclaiming that it will have to close its doors by 2012 because it will run out of money, is going to entertain the ludicrous notion of hiring a violin teacher for $35,000 to teach 35 days.

So, I checked my e-mail and...

DAMN!

Ron was right!!!

He hasn't "lost it"...THEY HAVE!!!

So, CAT fans...I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!

I have agreed to accept the mission (although I'll have to make a pit-stop. Singed the fur right off my paws when the message self-destructed!)

However, stay tuned!

Ron has promised to create a new link on the CAT Home Page for my daily, weekly, and/or monthly reports on the latest financial misadventures by Cairo School District officials...