CAT Tracks for January 7, 2011

CAT Tracks for January 7, 2011

It is 10:21 a.m. as I sit down to type this missive.

I was expecting to name it "Looks Like He Made It", but I am forced to stay with my original thought...

...because his car is still snug in its bed.

Flashback...

...to shortly after 9 a.m.

This intrepid CAT reporter (double naught CAT?) was tending to CAT stuff...hand-delivering today's special hard-copy edition of CAT Tracks (concerning changes in federal taxes and withholding) to insure that it reached the less "connected" CATs out there, when lo and behold, what did I notice but that the Superintendent's command car was still "tucked in" at his taxpayer provided cottage on the grounds of Cairo Junior/Senior High School.

After a visit to the Central Office to deliver the aforementioned CAT Tracks to employees (mailboxes) there, I headed north for an out-of-town errand.

Of course, I had to ass-u-me that by the time I returned to Cairo, the Superintendent would be up and at 'em...if nothing else, getting in a round of golf before heading off to work.

Well, as they say, the best laid plans of CATs and men...

...at 10:15 a.m., the Superintendent's car is still nestled...snug as a bug in a rug.

Okay, since "Enquiring Minds" always want to know, I shall speculate, also known as rumor mongering...

The Superintendent is using "comp time". I mean...the Board of Education had the audacity to call a Special Meeting for Friday evening at 5 p.m. (get-away Friday!) That's hours of "overtime"...whether you count it from a "noon departure" or from the end of the normal business day. Surely he's entitled!

I mean...teachers. Surely YOU understand. The District always gives YOU comp time whenever it requires YOU to give up YOUR free time for faculty meetings, etc. Right???

Or...

Maybe the Superintendent decided on this beautiful, sunny Friday morn...to stroll over to the Cairo Junior/Senior High School building and engage in some instructional leadership.

I didn't see the Superintendent when I went into the teachers' lounge to stuff mailboxes, but then he wouldn't be hanging out in there...he would in "the trenches", the classrooms...showing the lesser mortals how to make a difference. Right???

Then, again...

Maybe the Superintendent was (like his car) still nestled in his bed..."dreaming" up performance goals for tonight's BOE meeting!

And, the BOE...they will probably be most appreciative. I mean...should they get stuck tonight, Mr. Superintendent can whip out some bad boy performance goals, move the agenda, and proudly announce...

"It's time to eat!"

CAT Tracks Editor's Note:
A sense of fairness moves me to an alternate explanation for the Superintendent being "home" instead of at work at 10:30 a.m.
He overslept...due to an old worn out alarm clock. I mean...his good one is surely sitting righteously on the bed stand of his Chicago home. How many alarm clocks should one person be required to have? If the BOE expects him to have two, well...a raise is probably in order! If you will recall, the financial statement published by Cairo School District Number One in The Cairo Citizen (and sent to ISBE?) didn't even list Superintendent Swopes as having a salary. Figures that if CSD #1 is that cheap, the free-rent cottage (with subsidized utilities) probably didn't even come equipped with an alarm clock.
A damned shame!

Speaking of rumor mongering...
Folks, I have heard a couple during the past week that have made my heard-it-all-before jaw drop...and left me speechless, followed by expletives deleted.
However, I am not at liberty to reveal them at this time because, unlike the ones above, these are apparently true.
Keep reading your CAT Tracks...

FOOTNOTE:
I have already received feedback from an avid reader of CAT Tracks...
...that perhaps the Superintendent had car problems...that someone gave him a lift to work.
Right!!!

UPDATE:
This just in...
A credible witness has come forward and offered testimony that the Superintendent was on the CJSHS "golf course" at approximately 7:20 a.m. this morning talking to the head greenskeeper (aka Tracy Bohde.) The witness related the location of the Superintendent, but did not actually comment on whether or not he was hitting golf balls.

Bottom Line: So much for the "overslept" scenario...and laying blame for the Superintendent's tardiness/absence from work upon a bum alarm clock. Accordingly, out the window goes the rationale that the Superintendent needs a raise.